The Idiotic Story with Absoluetly No PLot
by samurai-swords-maid
Summary: CHAP FOUR UP! DDR addicted kaoru, talkitive aoshi, Kurama is just plain weird, Sango's best friends are machines, and tuskasa keeps changing....GET READY FOR OOC! NO! EVIL HAIRCUTTERS! RUN FOR YOUR HAIIR! R&R! ratedforlanguage. is it chicken?
1. The MadHouse Begins

Sugarhigh on Rampage  
  
Saph(me): yes! Sugar! It is my best friiieeend!! Kenshin: O.o Saph: anyways, psycho idea where I get to OOC everyone! (psycho laughter ensues) Everyone else: (edge away) Saph: well, I don't own Rurouni Kenshin, Inuyasha, Yu Yu Hakusho, or Yu-Gi- Oh! And major OOCness ahead! And I don't own any of the anime in this story. Unfortanetly. I own nothing. Yugi: I have a bad feeling about this..... Yusuke: you said it. Saph: (halo above head appears, then crackles, and goes out) stupid halo. Well, let's go, and get on with the sugarhigh rampage!!  
  
Chapter one- Sugar and pretty flow- OOOOH! LOOK AT ALL THE PRETTY COLORS!! Saph: KENSHIN!  
  
Kenshin: (comes running in) oro!  
  
Saph: did you know that socks haunt me in my dreams? And my door is voodooed. It closes whenever I'm alone upstairs at night doing my homework. It just SHUTS! Isn't that scary? And my friend, she is in love with every bishounen in the world, and she has a boyfriend too! That's like cheating don't you think? And you know what else? I have to get presents ready in 2 days, cause that's when I'm going to a party, and I have no money, so that means I have to make them, and I don't know what to get my friends. What do I do, Kenshin?  
  
Kenshin: oro?????  
  
Saph: I said, did you know that socks haunt me in my dreams? And my door is voodooed. It closes whenever I'm alone upstairs at night doing my homework. It just SHUTS! Isn't that scary? And my friend, she is in love with every bishounen in the world, and she has a boyfriend too! That's like cheating don't you think? And you know what else? I have to get presents ready in 2 days, cause that's when I'm going to a party, and I have no money, so that means I have to make them, and I don't know what to get my friends!! What do I do, Kenshin??? And you said "Oro??" so I said did you know that socks haunt me in my dreams? And my door is voodooed. It closes whenever I'm alone upstairs at night doing my homework. It just SHUTS! Isn't that scary? And my friend, she is in love with every bishounen in the world, and she has a boyfriend too! That's like cheating don't you think? And you know what else? I have to get presents ready in 2 days, cause that's when I'm going to a party, and I have no money, so that means I have to make them, and I don't know what to get my friends. What do I do, Kenshin?  
  
Kenshin: um, ask Ryou about this....  
  
Saph: ok. RYOU! Ryou: (comes in) yea?  
  
Saph: well, I was asked Kenshin, did you know that socks haunt me in my dreams? And my door is voodooed. It closes whenever I'm alone upstairs at night doing my homework. It just SHUTS! Isn't that scary? And my friend, she is in love with every bishounen in the world, and she has a boyfriend too! That's like cheating don't you think? And you know what else? I have to get presents ready in 2 days, cause that's when I'm going to a party, and I have no money, so that means I have to make them, and I don't know what to get my friends. What do I do, Kenshin? And then he said, Oro?, so I said I said, did you know that socks haunt me in my dreams? And my door is voodooed. It closes whenever I'm alone upstairs at night doing my homework. It just SHUTS! Isn't that scary? And my friend, she is in love with every bishounen in the world, and she has a boyfriend too! That's like cheating don't you think? And you know what else? I have to get presents ready in 2 days, cause that's when I'm going to a party, and I have no money, so that means I have to make them, and I don't know what to get my friends!! What do I do, Kenshin??? So that's what happened. What do you think?  
  
Ryou: I think you need to slow down when your talking.  
  
(loud crash is heard somewhere in the.place where everyone is at..Saph's house)  
  
Saph: what was that?  
  
Shippou: (runs into the room) saph, saph! Inuyasha attacked the hard, white rectangular demon in your kitchen, and it exploded!  
  
Saph: huh?  
  
Kenshin: shippou said, saph, saph! Inuyasha attacked the hard, white rectangular demon in your kitchen, and it exploded! And you said, Huh? So I said shippou said, saph, saph! Inuyasha attacked the hard, white rectangular demon in your kitchen, and it exploded! And you said, Huh?  
  
Saph: um, I think I'll go see about this. (goes into the kitchen)  
  
Inuyasha: (yelling at the refridgerator) GIVE ME THE FOOD! TELL ME WHERE THE FOOD IS AT! WHY DID YOU MAKE SAPH GIVE YOU THE FOOD! TELL ME!  
  
Saph: (Sweatdrops) uh, inuyasha..that's the fridge. We put food in it so it wont rot.  
  
Inuyasha: well, it looked like a weird demon. And you gave it all your food! Even the extra ramen!  
  
Shippou: (comes running in again....) Saph, Saph! Yusuke broke something! Saph: oh dear...(goes upstairs to her room to find that her posters were slightly burned) what happened...OH NO! MY KENSHIN POSTER! (begins to twitch)  
  
Yusuke: uh-oh.....  
  
Saph: yeah, you had better "uh-oh"! run now, or I'll be comin' after you! (begins to chase  
  
Yusuke around the house with a bokken that appeared out of nowhere) AH KEEL YA!  
  
Yugi: (randomly walks in, whistling) doo dooby da doo (sees Saph) uh-oh...  
  
Yami Yugi: should I stop her?  
  
Yugi: I guess.  
  
Yami Yugi: (grabs Saph's arms so she cant run anymore)  
  
Saph: AH KEEL YA! RUN, OR AH KEEL YA! (glares up at Yami Yugi, twitching)  
  
Yugi: (comes over) did you have any sugar today?  
  
Saph: (twitch twitch) no.  
  
Hiei: unless you count the 3 bags she ate this morning.  
  
Saph: (stares) you know about my sugar.....you know about my suagr....you know about my sugar?! NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO KNOW ABOUT MY SUGAR! IT IS SEEECRET SUGAR! SEEEEEECRET! NO ONE IS SUPPOSED TO KNOW, OR IT'S NOT SECRET SUGAR ANYMORE!  
  
Kenshin: oro?  
  
Kurama: (randomly walks in) hi. (leaves....somewhere)  
  
Rest: O.o  
  
Kurama: (comes back in, holding a cup of tea) tea is good. Very good. Do any of you want tea? Tea is good. Good for calming the spirit.  
  
Rest: O.o tea?  
  
Kenshin: oro?  
  
Saph: (twitch twitch) WHERE IS MY SECRET SUGAR? GIVE ME MY SUGAR!  
  
Sanosuke: (also randomly appears, holding a bag of sugar) you want this? Then come and get it.  
  
Saph: (looking strangely at Sano) Sano, why are you wearing a cape?  
  
Sanosuke: because I want to be DUN DUN DUN DUN! A suuuuper!!!! Heeeeeeeeeero! Hey, wait a second, I'm not wearing a cape!  
  
Rest: O.o  
  
Aoshi: (walks in with Misao) hi. (stares at everyone who stares back)  
  
Misao: (stares)  
  
Aoshi: (smiles at Misao) and, like I was saying, he came at me with his sword, and I of course knew what he was gonna do, so I dodged it, and attacked him from the side, and knocked him out.  
  
Kenshin, Sanosuke: (look at each other, then at Aoshi) did Aoshi just say all that? I think that's the most I've ever heard out of Aoshi! (amazed looks)  
  
Aoshi: like, duuudes, that just means your not listening to me, unlike dear Misao over here, who listens to me no matter what, isn't that right, Misao?  
  
Misao:.......  
  
Rest: O.o (in heads) what's going on...?  
  
Saph: COME TO MEEEE, SUGAR!!! ( teleports out of yami's grasp and grabs sugar) n_n  
  
Joey: (randomly walks in, tristan, Kurama, hiei, bakura and Miroku in a line after him)hungry hungry hip-PO!  
  
Saph: YAY! HUNGRY HIPPOS! (joins the line)  
  
Tsukasa: (suddenly jumps in, dressed like a surfer dude) liiiike, hey dudes and dudettes. Like how about we hit some waves, ya know, dude? I mean, like, hang ten, man. Let's go man! (drags mimiru with him to the beach that doesn't exist)  
  
Everyone else: O.o  
  
Yugi's grandpa: (randomly walks in) GUESS WHAT YUGI?  
  
Yugi: what?  
  
Yugi's grandpa: I don't know!!!! Isn't that just AMAZING?  
  
Yugi: really? I never knew that! (both stare off into space for the longest period of time in the amazing truth that yugi's grandpa has hair)  
  
Hiei: (seemingly the only sane one) why are we here?  
  
Kenshin: BECAUSE IT'S THE FEAR FACTOR! (fear factor music plays)  
  
Sanosuke: (also randomly appears) no, it's because it's Blind Date!  
  
Saitou: (also randomly appears) no, ahou, it's because of the ferret! (points to the ground next to him, nothing is there)  
  
Bakura: it's the mangos, I assure you!!  
  
Saph: uum..sugarsugarsugarsugar..?  
  
Kaoru: (playing DDR) OH YEAH! IN YOUR FACE, MEGUMI! NOW WHO'S THE BEST DANCER AROUND? HUH? TELL ME? SHAKE IT!  
  
Everyone else: O.o (edge away)  
  
Saph: (talking to the wall) if mad cows didn't rule the world, then there would be no green moss! Yes, there would still be rubber bands, but no green moss! Horrible! And, if the world was ruled by my photo album, then we would have no paper boats to play with in kindergarden! What's that? I'm not crazy! I'm talking to you because you talked to me first! Am not! Am not! Liar! LIAR! LIIIAAAAAR! Li- oooh, pretty colors! (staring at a rainbow that appeared out of nowhere)  
  
Miroku: I haven't had a line throughout this whole story! And run away! Rainbows will rain colored little thingies at you, and they land on you, and then you get addicted to them, but they are really yummy, but you still shouldn't eat them.  
  
Sango: are you talking about Skittles?  
  
Miroku: yes. They are irrational. Impossible, and against my religion (hands strays to Sango's bottom)  
  
Sango: *slaps hand away) and groping isn't against it? And, no it's not impossible, because clocks are my best friends. (walks away)  
  
kaoru and megumi are arguing over who is the best dancer, saph is muttering about sugar, yugi and his grandpa are STILL staring, Aoshi is talking non-stop, Misao isn't talking at all, and everyone else is.just there. To look pretty. Wait. Never minds. They're just..there!  
  
~****~****~****~****~****~****~****~****~****~****~**** a/n: it is not funny, isn't it? I'm sorry, I'm a horrible author! I'll try to make the next chapter funnier. I had a hard time with this one, but the next two I swear will be better. Yes. And there are too many people! Argh! Anyways, review or die. Pleeeeeeaaaaase? 


	2. THE NERDY SWEATER TALKS!

Sugarhigh on Rampage  
  
Saph: CHAPTER TWO IS HEEEEERE! YEAH! GO BRAINSTORMING! WOOOOOO! Disclaimer: she don't own any of da anime in dis story, got dat, brotha? K. good. Saph: (stares at disclaimer) why is my disclaimer a gangster... (not that I have anything against them, I just find it strange.)  
  
Chapter two- THE NERDY SWEATER TALKS!!!  
  
Saph: you know what?  
  
Yahiko: (appears out of nowhere..like everyone else) whatwhatwhatwhatwhat?  
  
Saph: I saw a picture of Yusuke pointlessly jumping over a fence, Kuwabara...smiling stupidly, Hiei..being Hiei..and Kurama wearing a dorky sweater!!!  
  
Kurama: O.O you said you would never tell of that! How dare you lie to me! How dare you!!!!!  
  
Saph: yup. It's true! See? (holds up the picture)  
  
Kurama: NOOOOOO! I HAVE BEEN EMBARRASSED! NOOOO! (jumps out of window)  
  
Hiei:........what do you mean, I'm just being me?  
  
Saph: you know, your being..YOU!  
  
Hiei: what's THAT supposed to mean?  
  
Kurama's nerdy sweater: (appears) NOOOOO! WHERE IS MY MASTER, KURAMA? IF HE DOESN'T WEAR ME TODAY, I WILL SHRIVEL UP AND THEN TURN INTO A PILE OF GOO!!! COME BACK, MAAAAAASTER!  
  
Kenshin: the nerdy sweater speaks!  
  
Sano: the nerdy sweater SPEAKS!  
  
Kaoru: THE nerdy sweater speaks!  
  
Megumi: the NERDY sweater speaks!  
  
Aoshi: the nerdy SWEATER speaks!  
  
Yusuke: THE NERDY SWEATER SPEAKS!!!  
  
All: (stare at him) like, duuude. We were getting there.  
  
Yusuke: oh. (turns into a marshmellow shaped like Yusuke, then turns back)  
  
Saph: SUGAR!!!  
  
Nerdy sweater: MASTER KURAMAAAAAAA!  
  
Kurama: (appears) NERDY SWEATER! YOU'RE OK! (hugs nerdy sweater)  
  
Nerdy sweater: MASTER! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!  
  
Aoshi: so, like I was saying, I had a goldfish named bob. I used to talk to him AAAAALLL the time. But then, one day he died. So I flushed him down the toilet and said "BYE BYE!" and then I ran out of the bathroom, and threw Soujiro down the toilet too.  
  
Misao: .......  
  
Rest: O.o  
  
Soujiro: (randomly appears...again...like everyone else....) (cries) it.....it..was so scary!!! The water went all around, and there was a big sound, and then Aoshi put the plunge thingy ((a/n: you know, the thing they used to unclog the toilet? I know, I'm not even smart enough to know it's name. But in my family, I just say "get me the plunge thingy" and they know what I'm talking about. Well, on with da story!)) on my head, and I went into the sewers where all the flushed down the toilet goldfishes were holding a meeting to take over the world and destroy all the toilets! (curls into a ball and sucks on thumb).  
  
Saph: O.o then why are you still smiling?  
  
Soujiro: (still smiling...as usual) I'm not smiling.  
  
Kenshin: yes, you are.  
  
Soujiro: (still smiling) nuh-uh.  
  
Kenshin: (looking like a little kid) yeah-huh.  
  
Soujiro: (still smiling) nuh-uh.  
  
Kenshin: yeah-huh.  
  
Soujiro: nuh-uh.  
  
Kurama: NERDY SWEATER, I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!  
  
Nerdy sweater: (becomes inanimate object...like it was supposed to be in the first place...)  
  
Kurama: nerdy sweater? Nerdy sweater? Hello? NOOOOOO!!! (shakes nerdy sweater) WHERE IS MY BEST FRIEND JOBOB! WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM???  
  
Saph: (cries) don't remind me of Jobob!  
  
Sano: who's Jobob?  
  
Saitou: (smoking) ahou, don't you know anything? Jobob is really superman in disguise who is really a shiny FORK!!  
  
Sano: but forks are really just spoons with sharp thingies!  
  
Saitou: stupid ahou, forks are really THE GOVERNOR OF CALIFORNIA!!!!  
  
Saph's best friend: (appears in a cloud of smoke [see, he's SPECIAL!]) Jobob was Saph's 5 millimeter long pencil she wrote with. It was the only pencil she had. And then a tragedy happened. He fell down the trashcan. And then we had a funeral for it. Saph was very sad for a long time, and she couldn't do her schoolwork because she had no other pencils. Thank you. (disappears in a cloud of water....wait...that doesn't make sense. Whatever)  
  
Saph: (sniffs) I miss Jobob, he was a good pencil. ((A/N: I'm not kidding, that WAS the only I had to write with for like a few months)) oh well. (eats a pound of sugar that magically appeared)  
  
Miroku: (shaking head) amazing how she got over her sadness so quickly.  
  
Inuyasha: I still want ramen.  
  
Yahiko: (randomly begins to rap his song) Don't call me a kid, cause I ain't little, I ain't weak, Cause soon I'll be strong. So watch out world, I'm gonna getcha, No one can stop me (looks at Kenshin) Well, maybe 'cept him. CAAAAAUUUUESE!! I'm a big kid now!  
  
Everyone else: O.o  
  
Joey: I think little Yahiko has lost it...  
  
Yahiko: didn't I just tell you not to call me little!!  
  
Yami: SAPH! WHY HAVEN'T I HAD A LINE YET? I AM ONE OF YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS??? WHYYYY?  
  
Saph: um, yeah, you just got you line.  
  
Yami: oh. (turns to random person) IT'S TIME DUE-DUE-DUE-DUE- DUEL! (YGO! Theme song begins to play)  
  
Random person: I don't know how to play Yu-Gi-Oh!!  
  
Yami: big deal! It's still time to due-due-due-due-due-duel!  
  
r.p.: MOMMY! THERE ARE SCARY PEOPLE HERE! TAKE ME HOME! (runs away crying)  
  
yami: COME BACK! I MUST DUEL YOU! COME BACK HERE! DAMN IT, I'M NOT THE FAST ONE! GET BACK HERE, AND DUEL ME, YOU COWARD! (chases the poor, poor, random person)  
  
hiei: I have an idea, let's all become ice statues!! (becomes an ice statue)  
  
Botan: is it even POSSIBLE for a fire demon to become an ice statue???  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Botan: but then..  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Botan: you don't even know what I was saying....  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Tea: she-  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Tea: hey-  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Botan: Saph is my friend!  
  
Saph: n_n yay!  
  
Tea: hey-  
  
Saph: no.  
  
Tristan: you're stupid.  
  
Saph: O.o  
  
Tristan: yeah.  
  
Saph: O.o  
  
Tristan: how do you like them apples??  
  
Saph: fried.  
  
Tristan: yeah, well I'll sautee you too.  
  
Everyone else: O.o  
  
Joey: heyyy! I'm hungry!  
  
Inuyasha: I want ramen.  
  
Tristan: PIZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Saph: (Sweatdrops) I know I'M always hungry, but my mind isn't always on food!  
  
Yahiko: why?  
  
Saph: O_o;; cause I am not a glutton.  
  
Yahiko: why?  
  
Saph: o_O;; cause I'm not.  
  
Yahiko: why?  
  
Saph: cause I ....I don't know..  
  
Yahiko: why?  
  
Saph: why not?  
  
Yahiko: I don't know...  
  
Saph: why?  
  
Yahiko:...  
  
Saph: n_n (thinking) it's MY job to annoy people like that!  
  
br saph and Yahiko are having a "why?" contest, Inuyasha, tristan, and joey are whining about food, Yami is STIll chasing after that person (O_o;;) and uuh.kurama is trying to revive his sweater..(O_o;;;;;)  
  
that wasn't funny, was it? Well, REVIEW ANYWAYS! 


	3. ATTACK OF THE EVIL HAIRCUTTER!

The Idiotic Sotry with Absolutely No PLot  
  
Saph: chapter threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!  
  
Disclaimer: leave me alone! Saph owns nothing but herself! Now go away..(goes away, muttering darkly under his breath)  
  
Saph: humph. Anyways, answers to reviews.wow, I actually, GOT some.  
  
Forbidden Turkey- er..yes, you are the first turkey to review my story. In fact, the first turkey to review ANY of my stories.thanks for reviewing it..  
  
Dreammaster2411- is it ok if I just answer you're review by calling you "Taji"? and no, you cannot die! You hear me? CANNOT, CANNOT, CANNOT! (eyes well up with tears) you..you were inspirited? By MY story? You don't know how great that makes me feel!!! YOU, one of the funniest authors I've ever known, inspirited by ME!! (cries) Kenshin: she's just a little over-emotional about this... Saph: anyways, I am forever grateful for your reviews! For your second review..er..owoh??  
  
Saph: well, now that's done with, lets get on with the story!! n_n  
  
Chapter three- ATTACK OF THE EVIL HAIRCUTTER!!!!  
  
Saph: (calmly watching Yami chase that person, Joey and Tristan argue, and Kurama STILL trying to revive his sweater)  
  
Explosion: BOOM!  
  
Saph: O_o;; what happened?  
  
Voice: SAAAAAAPH! TIME FOR YOUR HAAAIIIIRR CUUUUUUUUUUT!!  
  
Saph: O_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (takes breath) OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Voice: (is really THE EVIL HAIRCUTTER OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM) COME HERE, AND LET ME CUT OFF YOUR HAIR, SAAAAAAPH!  
  
Saph: (running around the room panicking) NOOO! YOU WILL NEVER CUT MY HAIR!! NOOOOOOO!  
  
Kenshin: O_O cutting hair!! ORO! NOOOOOO! (runs around room with Saph)  
  
Everyone else: O_o;;  
  
Yugi: (out of his reverie) NOOO! HAIRCUTTERS ARE EVIL! THEY WILL NEVER CUT MY COOL HAIR! IT'S TOO COOL! (runs around room too)  
  
Hiei: (unbecomes an ice statue) I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!! LET'S DO THE POKEDANCE! (turns into an ice statue)  
  
Haircutter of DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM: (grabs Kenshin) hahahaha! A victim- er, I mean, customer! Now, I think he will look great BALD!!  
  
Kenshin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO(takes breath) OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  
  
Saph: Oh no!  
  
Kaoru: Oh no! (goes back to playing DDR)  
  
Kenshin's reverse-blade sword (sakabatou): oh no!  
  
Kool-Aid man: (crashes in through wall) OOOOOOH, YEAH!  
  
Rest: (stare at Kool-Aid man)  
  
Kool-Aid man: . (walks back out slowly)  
  
Kenshin: YOU CAN'T CUT MY HAIR!!! I WILL NOT ALLOW IT, THAT I WON'T!  
  
Saph: he's right! You CAN'T!! it's too cool!!! Now, Kurama, on the other hand.....  
  
Kurama: hey! I have red hair too! What's the difference between me and Kenshin???  
  
Saph: (matter-of-factly) because Kenshin's hair is cooler than yours!  
  
Kurama: how?  
  
Saph: I don't know! It just IS!  
  
Kenshin: MY HAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRR!  
  
Saph: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I WILL SAVE YOUR COOL HAIR, KENSHIN!!! HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (jumps hair-cutter dude, and begins to punch him) AN OPENING! (punch) (kick) (poke) (kick) (kick) (kick) (punch) (bokken attack)  
  
Inuyasha: I could be wrong, but toto. ORO! My noodles are ready!  
  
Kenshin: ORO is my word!!  
  
Inuyasha: whatever. (runs to get noodles)  
  
Saph: ok, I'm done beating up the haircutter dude!  
  
Kenshin: YAY! YOU SAVED MY REALLY REALLY REALLY COOL HAIR! (hugs Saph) NOW LET'S SHARE SUGAR! (magically gives Saph a cupful of sugar)  
  
Saph: YAYYYYY!! (devours sugar)  
  
rest: he did not just do that.  
  
Sano: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Run for your lives! SAPH HAD SUGAR!  
  
Kenshin: (randomly disappears)  
  
Saph: HEY! WHERE DID KENSHIN GO!! NOOO! WHERE'S KENSHIN? NOOO!  
  
Inuyasha: (randomly appears, holding a cup of noodles) YOU MEAN YOU LOST KENSHIN?? GUYS LIKE US DON'T JUST FALL FROM THE SKY, YOU KNOW!  
  
Kenshin: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! (comes falling through roof)  
  
Miroku: (looks up hopefully) beautiful woman who want to bear my child don't just fall out of the sky, you know.  
  
Saph: (mutters) lecher. (hugs Kenshin) KENSHIN! YOU'RE OK! LETS HAVE SUGAR TO CELEBRATE!  
  
Sano: (to Megumi) why do you call me rooster-head?  
  
Megumi: cause you ARE a rooster head...  
  
Sano: why?  
  
Megumi: er..cause that's the way your hair was when you were born..  
  
Sano: why?  
  
Megumi: BECAUSE PURPLE MAD COWS EAT MAHOGONY WOOD! (curls up and has shifty eyes)  
  
Rest: O.o;;  
  
Kaoru: (still dancing away at the DDR machine that randomly appeared in Saph's house) oh yeah, go me! WHO ROCKS AT DANCING? HUH? TELL ME! WHO DA BEST?? OH YEAH!  
  
Rest: o.O;;  
  
Kaoru: (suddenly begins to sing "Hey Ya") shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it like a Polaroid, shake it...hey, wait a second..what's a Polaroid?  
  
Kenshin: ORO???  
  
Saph: x_x  
  
Yahiko: what happened to her?  
  
Soujiro: (still curled up, sucking on his thumb) HER SOUL WAS TAKEN BY THE EVIL GOLDFISHES THROUGH THE TOILET BECAUSE THEY NEED SOULS TO REVIVE AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD AND DESTROY ALL THE TOILETS!! (shifty eyes)  
  
Hiei: no, she just doesn't like that song.  
  
Soujiro: (twitch) I still say her soul was stolen by the evil fishes who need souls to revive and take over the world and destroy all the toilets.  
  
Megumi: (calmly) I say she fell down a big hole and can't get out.  
  
Kurama: but she's right there! (Points at empty space)  
  
Megumi: my point exactly. (begins flapping like a bird) LOOK! I REALLY AM A FOX! I CAN FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! (jumps of 2-inch ledge)  
  
Rest: O.o;;  
  
Saph: (randomly jumps up) THAT SONG MUST DIIIIIIIIIIE! (turns on "Linkin Park" full blast)  
  
Everyone: (gets blown away) AAARGH!  
  
Saph: there. that's much better. ^_^  
  
Yami: WHO WANTS TO DUEL MEEEEEEE?  
  
Bakura: (appears out of nowhere...again...) pharaoh.  
  
Yami: tomb raider.  
  
Bakura: pharaoh.  
  
Yami: tomb raider.  
  
Bakura: Pharaoh.  
  
Yami: tomb raider.  
  
Kagome: (appears randomly too) STOP IT!  
  
Saph: where did YOU come from?  
  
Kagome: uuh..THE PLANET FULL OF SCHOOLGIRLS WITH REALLY REALLY SHORT SKIRTS! (disappears)  
  
Miroku: can I go there?  
  
Sango: no, the computers there guard it too well. (walks away)  
  
br Linkin Park is blasting everyone away, Kaoru is still dancing, Megumi is, er, "flying", Soujiro is muttering about goldfish, Yami and Bakura are saying "pharaoh" and "tomb raider" to each other, and chaos ensues.....(O.o;;;;;;;) OK, THAT WASN'T FUNNY, WAS IT? WAS IT? (sobs hysterically) WELL, REVIEW ANYWAYS! JUST DO IT, OK? JUST DO! (runs away crying) 


	4. Is it Chicken?

The Idiotic Story with Absolutely No Plot  
  
ehh... no comments today, 'cept I'm sorry for not updating in...uh...months. I have humor's block. I'm on an angst roll, and have mainly been writing angst. o.o; opposite, I know. But no one ever said I had to be normal!!   
  
NOTE: to avoid confusion, normal Marik will be "Marik," while Yami Marik will be "Malik." Also, I will be trying to use Yu-Gi-Oh!'s JAPANESE character names. Like this:  
  
Jonouchi=Joey  
  
Honda=Tristan  
  
Anzu= Tea (I think I'll kill her off... WEE! TEA-BASHING)  
  
Ryou= normal Bakura  
  
Bakura= Yami Bakura  
  
Got it? good.  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Chapter Four-Is it Chicken?  
  
EVERYONE: HAPPY HAPPY DAY! IT'S THE HAPPY HAPPY SONG! IT'S THE HAPPY HAPPY DAY, SO WE SIGN THE HAPPY HAPPY SONG! HAPPY HAPPY DAY! IT'S THE HAPPY HAP-  
  
MARIK: What's the best tuna?  
  
MALIK: (a/n: see note) CHICKEN OF THE SEAAA!!  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: o.O; whaaaaaaaaa????????????????  
  
MARIK: what's the best chicken?  
  
MALIK: chicken of the sea! (disappears in a puff of rainbow-colored smoke)  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: O.o;  
  
YAMI: YESSSSS! I HAVE DEFEATED MALIK AND SAVED THE WORLD! I RUUUUUUUUULE! (pumps fist in air)  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: (stares. edges FAAAAAAAAR away.)  
  
YAMI: (begins doing victory dance which includes the electric slide and the point.)  
  
SAPH'S OTHER FRIEND: (appears in cloud of chickens) NOOOOOOOOOO! MALIK! (disappears)  
  
JONOUCHI: but is it chicken?  
  
SAITO: of course it's chicken, ahou!  
  
KENSHIN: no way! it's like, totally tuna!  
  
INUYASHA: well, I say it's a green cow!  
  
MARIK: (oblivious) what's the best tuna?  
  
DISEMBODIED VOICE OF MALIK: chicken of the seaaaaaa!!!!!!!!  
  
MEGUMI: AAAAAAH! IT'S A GHOST! (hides behind non-existant table which is behind a non-existent chair which is behind a non-existant wall which is in a non-existant room)  
  
KAEDE: (randomly appears) No, child. IT'S THE FOREST OF IRISH GREEN MEN WITH PURPLE TIGHTS!   
  
YAHIKO: aaaaaaaaaaaaah! RUN AWAY! IT'S A DEMON! (points at Kaede)  
  
KAEDE: WHERE?! (looks around) BEGONE DEMON, BEGONE! (falls asleep) zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZzzz  
  
SANGO: YAYY! THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST IS DEAD! (begins square-dancing)  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: yayyy! (begin square-dancing)  
  
SAPH: do you know the ice cream man, the ice cream man, the ice cream man?!  
  
SANOSUKE: no, but I know the lollipop man! (licks lollipop)  
  
HIEI: (STILL the only sane one) it's MUFFIN MAN, bakas!  
  
KURAMA: (gasp) HIEI'S LOST HIS MIND!  
  
HIEI: -.- you're kidding right? YOU people are the ones who belong in a looney bin.  
  
KOENMA: (appears out of nowhere) WAAAAAH! YOU'RE SO MEAN, HIEI! YOU HURTED MY FEELINGS!!!!!! (sobs hysterically)  
  
SAITO: (girly gasp) YOU'RE SO MEAN! YOU MADE THE BABY CRY! (pats Koenma) It's ok, little baby. The mean man is gone now!  
  
HIEI: (twitches) HE'S NOT A BABY! HE'S OVER 500 YEARS OLD!  
  
-------------------------------------------------[BREAK TIME!]---------------------------------------------  
  
Saph: I bet you people are wondering why I haven't updated in FOREVER! Well, it goes like this:   
  
No, I'm not a lazy bum. Fine, I AM lazy bum. But I've also had humor's block. No, it's not an excuse. Yes, I know the sky is purple. Yes, I know the trees will eat my house if I sleep. No, I haven't slept in the past 1437128905712857 days. Yes, I have died 12783497120501285856 times in the last hour. No, if cheese did fail, then ketchup would take it's place.Yes, I know I am answering every single one of your questions in PERFECT ORDER! Yes, I am psychic. No way! Those people at the hospital were REALLYYYYYYYY nice! They gave me a FREE white jacket and put me in a padded room. But then I broke the walls of the padded room and had to run away. It was so sad. No, I'm not pyscho. Yes, I am mentally ill. YES, I'M PYSHIC! No, PSYCHIC, not PSYCHO. Psychic! PSYCHIC! PSYHIC!!!!!!!!! PSYCHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!   
  
-----------------------------------------[END BREAK]----------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
HONDA: ONCE YOU OPEN THEIR PACK, THEY SMIIILE RIGHT BACK, THE SNACK THAT SMILES BACK, GOLDFISH! (eats giant bags of nonexistent goldfish brand crackers)  
  
BOTAN: yay! NONEXISTENT CRACKERS! BINGO! (pulls oar out of nowhere) NOW, I MUST SLAY THE BEAST! (runs off into distant nowhereness.)  
  
YUSUKE: (sobs into hankie) NOOOO! BOTAN! DON'T GO! (sobs) She was always the brave one. But so reckless! WHYYYYYYYY????!!!!!!!! WHY DID SHE LEAVE!!!!!!!!!! (gets up and walks into wall)  
  
RANDOM VOICE: yay! HE WALKED INTO A WALL!  
  
YUSUKE: (gets up. sits in a chair)  
  
RANDOM VOICE: yeaaa! HE SAT IN A CHAIR!  
  
YUSUKE: (gets up. walks around in circles)  
  
MISAO: CAW CAW! CAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW!!!!!!!!! (explodes)  
  
RANDOM VOICE: yay! SHE CAWED AND EXPLODED!  
  
SAPH: RAWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!   
  
KENSHIN: MY LITTLE PONY!!!!!!!!! (runs off waving scarf around)  
  
YAMI: NOOOOO! MY SCARF! HE STOLE MY SCARF! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!   
  
YUGI: but how do you know it's YOUR scarf?  
  
YAMI: o.0 because....It's mine....  
  
YUGI: but how do YOU know it's YOUR scarf?  
  
YAMI: 0.o because.... I owned it...  
  
YUGI: but how do YOU know it's YOUR scarf just because you owned it?  
  
YAMI: BECAUSE THE RABID MONKEYS FROM PLANET DAIJOUBAINGLALALA SAID SO! (explodes)  
  
YUGI: now THAT'S a good reason! (walks off humming, oblivious to the fact YAMI has...exploded)  
  
INUYASHA: that was a LOUD explosion! It went KABLOOEY!  
  
MIROKU: nuh-uh! It went KABOOM!  
  
SOUJIRO: (appears out of nowhere)....it was the goldfish of doom from the toilet.... AND IT WENT BOOM BOOM! (curls back up into a ball and sucks on thumb)  
  
AOSHI: I am the strongest of the pit-fall spitting throwers!   
  
PIGGY: (randomly appears. has glasses on.) MY NAME IS MR. HAM! TODAY, YOU WILL WRITE AN ESSAY ON THE THINGIES OF WRITING!!!!!  
  
SAPH: thingies...of writing? o.0  
  
PIGGY NAMED MR.HAM: yes, the thingies of writing! You know, metaphores, rhyme, similes--  
  
MEGUMI: smilies!  
  
PIGGY NAMED MR.HAM: no, SIMILES  
  
MEGUMI: smilies!  
  
MR.HAM: SIMILES!  
  
MEGUMI: SMILIES!  
  
MR.HAM: SIMILES!  
  
MEGUMI:SMILIES!  
  
MR.HAM:SIMILES!  
  
MEGUMI: SMILIES!  
  
MR.HAM: SIMILESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (also explodes)  
  
MEGUMI: hah! I WIN! I ALWAYS KNEW THE PURPLE LEPRECHAUNS WOULD HELP ME! THANK YOU SO MUCH, PURPLE LEPRECHAUNS!! I AM FOREVER INDEBTED TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND BY THE POWER OF CHEESE, I SHALL ONE DAY JOIN YOU AND BECOME A PURPLE LEPRECHAUN NAMED LAPRIXIONITELIAS!!!  
  
SHINY THINGS: (randomly appear in room)   
  
EVERYONE ELSE: oooooooooooh, shinyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy (get starry-eyed)  
  
SAPH: wellllllllll..........  
  
MARIK: what's the best tuna?  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: chicken of the sea!  
  
INUYASHA: I still say it's mad green cows!  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
o-k. that's a wrap for this chap, cause I got humor's block again.  
  
Did you know that if you take the first letter of every word in the title it spells "TISWAN"? TISAWN!   
  
REVIEW! sorry, it's not funny, is it? ;-; 


End file.
